Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
