Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
