I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
