so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Randomize
