did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
