There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
