Texts From Last Night

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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall

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  (617): I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall http://tfl.nu/nke4
  Replies (19) Good night (4980) Bad night (890)
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  (224): View more from Illinois

  Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.

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  (224): Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night. http://tfl.nu/rq15
  Replies (9) Good night (3663) Bad night (1550)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.

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  (518): It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet. http://tfl.nu/rqq2
  Replies (8) Good night (5010) Bad night (1141)
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  (718): View more from New York

  it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store

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  (718): it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store http://tfl.nu/b87c
  Replies (8) Good night (4701) Bad night (941)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?

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  (775): Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"? http://tfl.nu/g7e2
  Replies (8) Good night (1855) Bad night (825)
• Favorite

  (907): View more from Alaska

  Can I color on your dick again?

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  (907): Can I color on your dick again? http://tfl.nu/t2pd
  Replies (12) Good night (1349) Bad night (580)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Wait does semen show up on blood tests?

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  (832): Wait does semen show up on blood tests? http://tfl.nu/pugn
  Replies (25) Good night (580) Bad night (1222)
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  (518): View more from New York

  Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future

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  (518): Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future http://tfl.nu/c1z9
  Replies (1) Good night (1087) Bad night (855)
• Favorite

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.

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  (601): You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass. http://tfl.nu/96n6
  Replies (7) Good night (2374) Bad night (503)
• Favorite

  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.

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  (306): we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads. http://tfl.nu/m4cs
  Replies (1) Good night (988) Bad night (327)
• Favorite

  (510): View more from California

  Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"

  (510): View more from California

  How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??

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  (510): Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion" (510): How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done?? http://tfl.nu/izmz
  Replies (5) Good night (650) Bad night (295)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like

  (630): View more from Illinois

  we should definitely drink gin again. soon.

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  (773): I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like (630): we should definitely drink gin again. soon. http://tfl.nu/20ks
  Replies (0) Good night (478) Bad night (301)
• Favorite

  (787): View more from Puerto Rico

  Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood

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  (787): Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood http://tfl.nu/bkre
  Replies (1) Good night (490) Bad night (334)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth

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  (301): I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth http://tfl.nu/nt7d
  Replies (4) Good night (441) Bad night (372)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.

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  (816): Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious. http://tfl.nu/g2fz
  Replies (0) Good night (410) Bad night (164)

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