Texts From Last Night

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  (847): View more from Illinois

  i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.

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  (847): i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1. http://tfl.nu/5eb0
  Replies (46) Good night (1847) Bad night (5747)
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  (810): View more from Michigan

  dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'

  (810): View more from Michigan

  needless to say i wont be back home tonight

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  (810): dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?' (810): needless to say i wont be back home tonight http://tfl.nu/wf6u
  Replies (38) Good night (4947) Bad night (585)
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  (224): View more from Illinois

  Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays

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  (224): Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays http://tfl.nu/pg2c
  Replies (19) Good night (6978) Bad night (645)
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  (504): View more from Louisiana

  once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.

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  (504): once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead. http://tfl.nu/caf0
  Replies (6) Good night (4106) Bad night (707)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad

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  (317): The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad http://tfl.nu/cny5
  Replies (20) Good night (3601) Bad night (1091)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.

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  (201): Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it. http://tfl.nu/rf1i
  Replies (4) Good night (2860) Bad night (1568)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  Mattress luging...It's a long story.

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  (503): Mattress luging...It's a long story. http://tfl.nu/0tlk
  Replies (5) Good night (3234) Bad night (766)
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  (863): View more from Florida

  she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?

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  (863): she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know? http://tfl.nu/bmzo
  Replies (6) Good night (784) Bad night (4443)
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.

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  (734): Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands. http://tfl.nu/f2kb
  Replies (12) Good night (3897) Bad night (877)
• Favorite

  (912): View more from Georgia

  There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.

  (912): View more from Georgia

  Do you need my fax number or something?

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  (912): There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow. (912): Do you need my fax number or something? http://tfl.nu/ynqo
  Replies (18) Good night (1554) Bad night (1194)
• Favorite

  (239): View more from Florida

  He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.

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  (239): He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish. http://tfl.nu/b945
  Replies (33) Good night (1046) Bad night (1885)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.

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  (610): I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with. http://tfl.nu/uzcd
  Replies (7) Good night (1335) Bad night (489)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.

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  (714): Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to. http://tfl.nu/rk2y
  Replies (5) Good night (624) Bad night (1277)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts

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  (610): Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts http://tfl.nu/c7v2
  Replies (0) Good night (397) Bad night (243)
• Favorite

  (251): View more from Alabama

  well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras

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  (251): well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras http://tfl.nu/4zxu
  Replies (1) Good night (247) Bad night (277)

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