Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
