at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Randomize
