There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
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