How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
