I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
