She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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