i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
My feet surprised me
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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