what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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