So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
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