yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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