yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Randomize
