Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Randomize
