I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
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