I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize