I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
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