I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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