I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
