Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
Why is your signature on my underwear?
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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