How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize