he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
organizing the empties. That sober.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
