ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Randomize
