Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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