i'm signing you up for texting rehab
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
