I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
