why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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