well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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