Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
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