I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
Randomize
