omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
