I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
