Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Don't EVER smell your tampon
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
