I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Actions speak louder than pants.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize
