You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
