PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
