I must be too annoying 4 u.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
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