It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Randomize
