I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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