After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Randomize
