that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
