omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize