bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Do vagina's smell?
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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