just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
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