Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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