Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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