were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
